Realistically there are no leaders to applaud you on or
cheer you up; you are reminded you have persevered through the worse but the
reality is it doesn’t sound much like a motivational speech nor does it inspire
you. Being stuck inside that darkened cave with the mass population of
homicidal prisoners and enemies makes you day just that much more badly.
The inspiration has to come from within and remind you of
your ability to be resilient and hard as your force is greater than the others
but you are worn and in dire need of sleep. Restless, you don’t want to let
your companions down so while fatigued you stand your watch creating an
attitude that you are made of iron and steel.
Sometimes when you sweat or bleed you are reminded you are
human. Not God-like but not like normal humans as you endure and cope with this
hellish heat that bears down on you in a furious glow ball of fire. Sometimes you are sucked down under water but somehow
you always find the strength and energy to reach up and out so high above you
and come up for air that is in the clouds.
Daily you brace your feet and stretch your arms beyond the
normal limits of your body and strain to get the work done. Your roots are
those around you as you promise to take the six so they are safer than before but
not out of reach of perils. In the darkness you find feces, urine and vomit and
refuse to keel backwards at the foul smell around you.
You long for peace but find hate; you yearn for kindness but
you only find a harsh and toxic inhumane conditions that cause you to rise your
alert levels so that you do not walk into a pit of poisonous spirits that surround
you daily.
The law is on your side but it does not matter – the arrogance
and bedlam around you dominate the environments moods and actions. You are
judged and your presence brings you many disputes and ill feelings by young and
old wearing chains but claiming innocence of their crimes. You try to laugh as
you see at the irony how they act with infected state of minds, unknown to
their families and lawyers.
Surrounded by all creatures you have to breathe the polluted
air and walk among the demons. These castaways are society’s rejects but to you
they are the ones you have sworn to protect from each other. Inside you is the
courage granted by the God above you while your knees suffer the endless
pounding of the concrete below your feet.
Some days you are blessed and other days you are cursed. You
never know what will encounter you nor do you have the knowledge of their will.
On a good day, karma and your loving God bestows you blessings and allows you
to walk away and go home just to go back to this Hell hole and do it all over
again. So you suffer physically and mentally but with perseverance you learn to
endure with the endless enduring spirit bestowed upon you not by authority or
position but by the courage you demonstrate as you walk these darkened caves
one more time.