Wasted Honor -

Carl R. ToersBijns is the author of the Wasted Honor Trilogy [Wasted Honor I,II and Gorilla Justice] and his newest book From the Womb to the Tomb, the Tony Lester Story, which is a reflection of his life and his experiences as a correctional officer and a correctional administrator retiring with the rank of deputy warden in the New Mexico and Arizona correctional systems.

Carl also wrote a book on his combat experience in the Kindle book titled - Combat Medic - Men with destiny - A red cross of Valor -

Carl is considered by many a rogue expert in the field of prison security systems since leaving the profession. Carl has been involved in the design of many pilot programs related to mental health treatment, security threat groups, suicide prevention, and maximum custody operational plans including double bunking max inmates and enhancing security for staff. He invites you to read his books so you can understand and grasp the cultural and political implications and influences of these prisons. He deals with the emotions, the stress and anxiety as well as the realities faced working inside a prison. He deals with the occupational risks while elaborating on the psychological impact of both prison worker and prisoner.

His most recent book, Gorilla Justice, is an un-edited raw fictional version of realistic prison experiences and events through the eyes of an anecdotal translation of the inmate’s plight and suffering while enduring the harsh and toxic prison environment including solitary confinement.

Carl has been interviewed by numerous news stations and newspapers in Phoenix regarding the escape from the Kingman prison and other high profile media cases related to wrongful deaths and suicides inside prisons. His insights have been solicited by the ACLU, Amnesty International, and various other legal firms representing solitary confinement cases in California and Arizona. He is currently working on the STG Step Down program at Pelican Bay and has offered his own experience insights with the Center of Constitutional Rights lawyers and interns to establish a core program at the SHU units. He has personally corresponded and written with SHU prisoners to assess the living conditions and how it impacts their long term placement inside these type of units that are similar to those in Arizona Florence Eyman special management unit where Carl was a unit deputy warden for almost two years before his promotion to Deputy Warden of Operations in Safford and Eyman.

He is a strong advocate for the mentally ill and is a board member of David's Hope Inc. a non-profit advocacy group in Phoenix and also serves as a senior advisor for Law Enforcement Officers Advocates Council in Chino, California As a subject matter expert and corrections consultant, Carl has provided interviews and spoken on national and international radio talk shows e.g. BBC CBC Lou Show & TV shows as well as the Associated Press.

I use sarcasm, satire, parodies and other means to make you think!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Saturday, August 23, 2014


It has been often thought or said out loud many persons must first learn how to love themselves before they can learn to love others. In reality what this means is (s) he must value his or her own opinion of self somewhat less than those of others. Self-loyalty is not a politically correct perception or impression in today’s age and manners. It is often misjudged and distorted and confuses many people in the practice of such an idea.

One can say that self-loyalty is an attitude and not a behavior. On the other hand, to be in harmony with self-loyalty one must not lie to himself or herself  as it means you must remain honest and realize you can’t run away from who you are and what your own needs are while sacrificing them for the benefit of someone else. A paradox perhaps, but a reality just the same that self-sacrifice is an important of this process.

Facing these facts makes self-loyalty a complicated situation for many who strive to be someone accepted by many if not all. Hence they are often misunderstood or called selfish in nature. Self-loyalty is essentially being someone who can be a natural best you can be individual who doesn’t worry about the needs of someone else if they compromise their own.

Sacrificing comes at the price of being your own person and dealing with difficult situations sometimes and is often subject to much peer pressure or family admonishment. You cannot lie to yourself and you can’t undermine your own life or future giving in to the demands of others. You can’t or shouldn’t make excuses for your perceived personal failures as you refuse to enable others but realize you must first enable yourself to be strong and dependable for future needs or expectations.

You must learn to enforce and reinforce everything in your life and not run away from them no matter how difficult they may be for you. You must be honest with yourself and stop enabling others who may force the issue when the subject comes up. This applies to every aspect of your life, both physically and mentally. Don’t make excuses for your shortcomings and no matter what the reason, be honest about how to take your own responsibility for these shortcomings rather than making excuses. Those who understand your reasoning or motive will respect you as you become consistently better at this progression of taking care of yourself first.

Self-loyalty is not the same as being selfish. Putting your own needs first is done to bring wellness and helping yourself in order to maintain a positive spirit within yourself. One must honestly ask “how can I help someone else if I am not well?” Keep your obligations or promises in perspective and do them with the competences you have by helping yourself first to face the challenges and fulfill your own obligation while you are feeling better about yourself and what you do. Its’ the best way to show people who you really are and how you feel about yourself as you feel better about yourself around others.