Wasted Honor -

Carl R. ToersBijns is the author of the Wasted Honor Trilogy [Wasted Honor I,II and Gorilla Justice] and his newest book From the Womb to the Tomb, the Tony Lester Story, which is a reflection of his life and his experiences as a correctional officer and a correctional administrator retiring with the rank of deputy warden in the New Mexico and Arizona correctional systems.

Carl also wrote a book on his combat experience in the Kindle book titled - Combat Medic - Men with destiny - A red cross of Valor -

Carl is considered by many a rogue expert in the field of prison security systems since leaving the profession. Carl has been involved in the design of many pilot programs related to mental health treatment, security threat groups, suicide prevention, and maximum custody operational plans including double bunking max inmates and enhancing security for staff. He invites you to read his books so you can understand and grasp the cultural and political implications and influences of these prisons. He deals with the emotions, the stress and anxiety as well as the realities faced working inside a prison. He deals with the occupational risks while elaborating on the psychological impact of both prison worker and prisoner.

His most recent book, Gorilla Justice, is an un-edited raw fictional version of realistic prison experiences and events through the eyes of an anecdotal translation of the inmate’s plight and suffering while enduring the harsh and toxic prison environment including solitary confinement.

Carl has been interviewed by numerous news stations and newspapers in Phoenix regarding the escape from the Kingman prison and other high profile media cases related to wrongful deaths and suicides inside prisons. His insights have been solicited by the ACLU, Amnesty International, and various other legal firms representing solitary confinement cases in California and Arizona. He is currently working on the STG Step Down program at Pelican Bay and has offered his own experience insights with the Center of Constitutional Rights lawyers and interns to establish a core program at the SHU units. He has personally corresponded and written with SHU prisoners to assess the living conditions and how it impacts their long term placement inside these type of units that are similar to those in Arizona Florence Eyman special management unit where Carl was a unit deputy warden for almost two years before his promotion to Deputy Warden of Operations in Safford and Eyman.

He is a strong advocate for the mentally ill and is a board member of David's Hope Inc. a non-profit advocacy group in Phoenix and also serves as a senior advisor for Law Enforcement Officers Advocates Council in Chino, California As a subject matter expert and corrections consultant, Carl has provided interviews and spoken on national and international radio talk shows e.g. BBC CBC Lou Show & TV shows as well as the Associated Press.

I use sarcasm, satire, parodies and other means to make you think!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

Places of the Past by Carl ToersBijns,

Lonely nights brings me back again to those dirty places
Just like the many times before I break the dawn sitting here, just silently thinking
Everything is the same and nothing is new or so it seems today
I’ve lost everything I owned but gained it back again

Photo by Maggie Irwin

 Driving down the lonely country road I threw it out the window
Never looking back in my rearview mirror because I knew all along, it would find its way back again
And start it all over and over just like it did before and before
Looking up to the sky I see it’s not falling as the colors keep my hopes alive
That tomorrow will bring me something new and different

Somedays these colors are not so perfect as they guide my thinking
Even when I can’t see the light I try to keep my eyes wide open
They help me out when I am lonely they keep me sane when the light goes dark
I have to stop this extremely thinking that takes me home again

I’ve been in war and dirty places as I wiped my tears away to shed the pain
I remember those extreme and noisy places just like it was yesterday
I never liked them then and hate them even more tomorrow
These extreme places cause me to be alone again inside this prison of my mind
Whether I will ever be loved again or find some room to share my heart
I fell apart so many times before I fell apart so many times before I am afraid to start

But not once did the noisy sounds inside my mind say to me it’s over
There is no need to close your eyes and suffer from the light
Life has let me down a time or two or maybe even more before I stopped counting
I didn’t give up but I didn’t couldn’t see the light with my eyes shut tight
Listening and feeling and knowing my heart is still beating
They couldn’t get me although in heaven’s name they tried and so my world will never be open
They couldn't get me, although in heaven's name they tried

As I hide from the darkened fear inside my head I closed it all,
I closed it all to stop the pain from hurting so many heartaches
So many places some say I fell apart but I am still standing
Never gave up on life but it’s easy to see that I keep going back to these dirty places
For where I am now, it is not at all where I want to be