Wasted Honor -

Carl R. ToersBijns is the author of the Wasted Honor Trilogy [Wasted Honor I,II and Gorilla Justice] and his newest book From the Womb to the Tomb, the Tony Lester Story, which is a reflection of his life and his experiences as a correctional officer and a correctional administrator retiring with the rank of deputy warden in the New Mexico and Arizona correctional systems.

Carl also wrote a book on his combat experience in the Kindle book titled - Combat Medic - Men with destiny - A red cross of Valor -

Carl is considered by many a rogue expert in the field of prison security systems since leaving the profession. Carl has been involved in the design of many pilot programs related to mental health treatment, security threat groups, suicide prevention, and maximum custody operational plans including double bunking max inmates and enhancing security for staff. He invites you to read his books so you can understand and grasp the cultural and political implications and influences of these prisons. He deals with the emotions, the stress and anxiety as well as the realities faced working inside a prison. He deals with the occupational risks while elaborating on the psychological impact of both prison worker and prisoner.

His most recent book, Gorilla Justice, is an un-edited raw fictional version of realistic prison experiences and events through the eyes of an anecdotal translation of the inmate’s plight and suffering while enduring the harsh and toxic prison environment including solitary confinement.

Carl has been interviewed by numerous news stations and newspapers in Phoenix regarding the escape from the Kingman prison and other high profile media cases related to wrongful deaths and suicides inside prisons. His insights have been solicited by the ACLU, Amnesty International, and various other legal firms representing solitary confinement cases in California and Arizona. He is currently working on the STG Step Down program at Pelican Bay and has offered his own experience insights with the Center of Constitutional Rights lawyers and interns to establish a core program at the SHU units. He has personally corresponded and written with SHU prisoners to assess the living conditions and how it impacts their long term placement inside these type of units that are similar to those in Arizona Florence Eyman special management unit where Carl was a unit deputy warden for almost two years before his promotion to Deputy Warden of Operations in Safford and Eyman.

He is a strong advocate for the mentally ill and is a board member of David's Hope Inc. a non-profit advocacy group in Phoenix and also serves as a senior advisor for Law Enforcement Officers Advocates Council in Chino, California As a subject matter expert and corrections consultant, Carl has provided interviews and spoken on national and international radio talk shows e.g. BBC CBC Lou Show & TV shows as well as the Associated Press.

I use sarcasm, satire, parodies and other means to make you think!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sunday, May 31, 2015

The Beach

The Beach

Standing on the hill, my eyes see the shimmering turquoise waters flowing onshore
The sun in my eyes, I cannot feel the pain no more
I tried to get away from the pain and sorrow by thinking only of tomorrow
But I tried too hard and now I failed as I see my ship has already sailed

A hot headed fight causes us to part our ways
We didn’t love each other enough to endure the strays
Slowly hurting each other, under the sun with too much fun day or night
All it ever did for us it to cause another fight

The water so cool, the sand a scorching furnace under my feet
I tried to walk the sands gently as I watch the rushing waters hit the low lying beach
My eyes with tears, my love for so many years, is gone like the golden sand in its watery home
The sand of the beach, the blazing sun is slowly cooking my brain as I realize she is gone

A hot headed argument, something not worth the fight
Caused us to part forever, as I wandered alone through the night
I found this beach where the sand welcomed the gently rushing sea
Realizing over and over, what my anger has taken away from me

Surrounded by diamond shaped rocks, made of lava and stone
I realize that I can no longer live and survive on my own
Watching the glimmering turquoise sea, gently and calmly caress the sand
I miss walking with her hand in hand over the glass smoothened sand

The sea, with every stroke of every wave it brought to shore
My brain is numb, my feet as cold as the water rushing ashore
The sand has turned marble white in my mind, making me feel the Artic cold
No longer warm or scorching hot like before
My heart is broken as I can still hear the slamming door

As I walk into the gentle surf I see a distant island in the horizon
Making me want to walk the waters and follow that current aflow
The wind in my hair, my ears hear the waves pounding and my eyes are tearing
I stand here, gazing into the waters, thinking my end is nearing

The water so cold, I can feel the numbness under my feet
The beach is no longer a place where I want to walk or sleep
The wind is ruining my moment here in the scorching sun
A hurricane blowing, a dark storm growing and having no place to run

The violent ocean, no longer friendly or gently licking the shore
I can’t get my head straight, I continuously keep getting wet
From walking into the deep blue waters about a hundred meters off shore
I turn away from the beach and walked into the abyss of the blue sea until I cannot walk anymore